


yellow curtains

by daggertattoos



Category: SKAM (TV)
Genre: Alternate Universe, Angst, Angst with a Happy Ending, Fluff, M/M, Parallel Universes
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2016-11-19
Updated: 2016-11-19
Packaged: 2018-08-31 23:03:08
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 1
Words: 9,823
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/8597194
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/daggertattoos/pseuds/daggertattoos
Summary: The first thing Isak notices when he wakes up are the curtains. They're yellow.
  See, the thing is, Isak's been here before, he knows he has. He's woken up in this exact moment, but different. The curtains were white and he was alone. or the one where isak wakes up in a parallel universe where the curtains are yellow and everything is good in the world





	

**Author's Note:**

> I finally did it. I've been wanting to write this for so long and I have been, on and off, and I finally got myself to finish it. On that note, please bear in mind that it's past 5am so any mistakes are my own. This is my first Isak/Even fic so please be kind! Also I was writing this during the hiatus/while the recent clips were coming out so some of it might be canon, some might not. Just go with the flow and enjoy it!
> 
> Translations:  
> • [Russian](https://ficbook.net/readfic/4975149)  
> • [Chinese](http://redforall.lofter.com/post/364100_d610d65)
> 
> T for language and stuff

_Can't I just stay here with you forever? Can I?_

_You can._

_―_

 

The first thing Isak notices when he wakes up are the curtains. They're yellow. Which is odd, because he knows for a fact that his curtains are white. So unless someone came in and changed his curtains while he was asleep, which is highly unlikely, then this isn't his room. Except it is. It's his posters hung up on his walls, his books spread out all over his desk, his clothes scattered around his floor. It's his sheets, on his bed, and oh. There's someone asleep beside him, he feels their arm wrapped around his bare waist, hears their soft breathing, smells their familiar scent. Now, that's new. He turns his head to look down. _Even_. His Even.

See, the thing is, Isak's been here before, he knows he has. He's woken up in this exact moment, but different. The curtains were white and he was alone. He was alone because Even had left him, with nothing but a note and his scent lingering on the pillows. But somehow, here he is again, living in this moment again, and this time, Even stayed.

Isak tries to stay still, afraid that if he moves, Even might just vanish into thin air and the curtains might somehow turn white again, but then it's Even who makes a move, arm tightening around Isak's body and he lets out a small yelp at the sudden force. Bad idea, because now Even's stirring awake, body stretching up against Isak's and he nuzzles his head closer to Isak's shoulder, looking up at him with sleepy eyes.

“Good morning,” he says, morning voice all croaky and rough, but soft at the same time and Isak almost whimpers.

“Morning,” he manages to choke out in return, but he must've sounded off because Even scoots back a little, eyes now wide open as they rake over every inch of Isak's face.

“You okay?” is what he asks, concern tinting his voice and all Isak can do is nod, because he's afraid that if he speaks, he might say the wrong thing.

Even hums thoughtfully, unsatisfied with his answer apparently. “You've got that look.”

“What look?”

Even furrows his eyebrows, pursing his lips, mirroring Isak's expression. “That look,” he teases, letting out a small chuckle as his thumb smoothens out the crease in the middle of Isak's forehead, before he stretches up to press a small kiss right there. “You know, you're gonna get wrinkles if you keep doing that.”

Isak gives him a shaky laugh in return, his heart beating a million times faster in his chest and he's not even sure why. Maybe he does. Maybe because Even always makes him feel all fluttery inside. Or maybe because this is fucking insane. It's insane that Even is here, in his bed, waking up next to him and Isak can't help himself when he suddenly says, “I thought you don't sleep?”

Even's eyebrows raise at that, a funny look on his face. “Why wouldn't I sleep?”

“Because... sleep is the cousin to death?” Isak answers hesitantly, the words sounding even dumber with every moment that passes.

Even stares at him blankly, the smile on his face completely gone and for a second, Isak wonders if he's gone and fucked it up, but then Even bursts out into a fit of giggles, shaking his head in amusement. “What the fuck are you talking about, Issy? That's a little depressing, don't you think?”

 _But you're the one who said it_ , is what Isak wants to say, but he doesn't get a chance to because Even's already rolling out of bed – _his bed_ – and he does it so smoothly, so naturally, like he's done it so many times before. He grabs a random shirt off the floor, pulling it on over his head and he heads towards the door, reaching for the knob.

“Wait! Even!” Isak scrambles out of bed, pulling on a hoodie as well before he chases after Even, who's already halfway out the door, grabbing at his arm in a weak attempt to pull him back into the room. “What the hell are you doing?”

Even gives him an odd look, eyes darting between Isak's and the grip on his arm. “I'm going to brush my teeth?”

“Why?” Isak blurts out and as soon as he hears how stupid that sounds, he wants to smack himself in the face.

Luckily for him, Even just laughs, wiggling his arm out of Isak's hold, pushing his way into the bathroom and Isak scampers after him, squeezing into the small space beside him. He watches as Even squeezes toothpaste out onto two toothbrushes, a blue one that he recognises as his own, and another that he's never seen before, but he assumes it's Even's when he puts it in his mouth, his other hand passing Isak's toothbrush to him. _Okay_ , why does Even have his own toothbrush here? Isak leans back against the wall and watches him with a curious eye as he slowly brushes his teeth, confused as to what's going on here.

Even seems to notice because once he's rinsed, he glances up at him, moving away from the sink. “Isak?”

“Hmm?”

“You're staring.”

Isak purses his lips, going over to the sink to rinse his mouth. “No, I'm not,” he murmurs between gargles, avoiding Even's eyes.

Even comes up behind him, settling against his back with his chin resting on Isak's shoulder and his arms curled around Isak's middle and Isak can't help but notice how they just _fit._ “Yes, you are,” he says, looking at Isak in their reflection.

“I...” Isak trails off when Even leans down to nip at his neck, chapped lips against his skin, up to the sharp line of his jaw. He's even more far gone when Even shifts his body, his hand coming up to turn his face towards him, mouth on his before he can even fully comprehend what's happening. He lets Even kiss him, lets him run his hand through his hair, lets him push him up against the wall. He lets Even kiss him until his lips are numb, until his knees go weak, until he can't breathe. Then he pushes a hand against Even's chest and Even sucks in a sharp breath, pulling away with a soft chuckle.

“Sorry.” He pecks at his lips again. “I'm sorry.” He smiles, another peck, and another, and another.

“ _Even_ ,” Isak whines, but he's not complaining, the small grin tugging at his lips is enough proof of that. Even mumbles another weak sorry, stealing one last kiss before he pushes off of him, turning to walk out the door and Isak has no idea where he's headed. For all he knows, he could be walking right into their kitchen, exposing the both of them to his roommates. But Isak is too dazed to care, his back still pressed up against the wall as he tries to catch his breath, the feeling of Even's lips still lingering on his own.

See, it feels like his Even, tastes like him too, but it's not him. It can't be him. Because his Even left. But this Even... _No_. This is crazy. There's only one Even. Only one Isak. Only white fucking curtains. Except he knows that's not true. He walks over to the sink, staring at himself in the reflection and it's him. It's him, it's his face and his body and his soul. But everything else isn't his. This world isn't his. _So, whose world is this?_

Isak doesn't know how long it takes him to shake himself out of it, but by the time he makes his way to the kitchen, Even's sat at the table with Eskild and Linn, pancakes and juice being passed around, all while they talk and laugh like they're in some fucking tv commercial.

“What's going on here?” Isak asks, uncertainty clear in his voice as his face scrunches up, eyes darting between everyone at the table.

Their laughter fades, and Eskild turns to Isak with an obvious roll of his eyes. “What's going on is breakfast, Isak,” he answers pointedly, gesturing at the food on the table. “You'd know that if you actually woke up early once in a while.” He scoffs lightly, clapping a hand onto Even's shoulder. “At least Even here appreciates our food.”

Isak swallows thickly, looking between him and Even, who's holding out a chair for him with one hand, a fork swinging in the other. “You two know each other?”

The answer is clear in the looks that he gets in return, a collective ‘duh’ hanging in the silence and he feels like an idiot as he mumbles, “ _Right_ , okay,” awkwardly sliding into the empty seat. He feels even worse when Even's hand reaches over to ruffle his hair, hearing him half-whisper, “He's been weird all morning, don't worry about it.”

“I'm sitting right here,” he grumbles, but Even ignores him, opting to just slide a pancake onto his plate and give him a small kiss on the cheek. Isak freezes, eyes almost popping out of his skull as he looks up, expecting the others to be staring at them. Except they're not. No one is even bothered. And Even seems unbothered too, continuing to stuff pancakes into his mouth.

Okay. _Okay_. So, in this world, the curtains are yellow, and Even is here, and everyone knows him. Everyone knows about _them_. This can't be happening. This isn't real. He doesn't even really know what _this_ is, but it's freaking the fuck out of him and he wants it to stop, so he chants the words over and over in his head like a mantra, squeezing his eyes shut. _This isn't real, this isn't real, this isn't-_

“What isn't real?”

Isak's eyes snap open, his head whipping up to see everyone staring at him expectantly, Even especially and he realises he'd been saying the words out loud. “Uh....” He squirms in his seat, hating the feeling of their eyes on him so he slowly gets up, backing away from the table. “Nothing, I just- I'm not hungry, so I'm, um, I'm gonna go take a shower.”

Even perks up at that, a cheeky smirk playing on his lips. “Can I join you?” he asks, quirking his eyebrows. “I'll wash your hair if you want.”

The others snicker quietly, pretending to turn back to their food, but he knows they're still watching in amusement and he feels uneasy in his gut. It's not that he doesn't like the idea of taking a shower with Even, fingers massaging into his hair, wet skin against his- _Fuck._ He can't. He just can't. So he flashes an awkward grin, feeling flustered as he shakes his head. “You know what, it's actually a little too cold to shower.” He stumbles towards the front door, stuffing his feet into his shoes and he grabs the first jacket he sees. “So, I'll, uh, I'm gonna go for a walk.”

Even arches an eyebrow. “It's too cold to shower, but not too cold to take a walk?”

“.... _Yeah_.”

And Isak gets the fuck out of there.

—

Isak doesn't know where he's going. Except he does. His feet know exactly where they're taking him because this world is the same. The streets are the same, the buildings are the same, the air is the same. They're the same, but they're not his. The park that he ends up in is not his, the bench that he sits on is not his, the jacket that he's wearing is _definitely_ not his. It's way too big and he doesn't want to think about whose it could be because deep down, he knows the answer to that.

As he sits there, he tries to recall the last thing he remembers of the real world. _His world_. He remembers Emma's party, and he remembers seeing Even, and he remembers Even kissing Sonja. He remembers running out, and pushing Mahdi, and Jonas shouting after him. He remembers lashing out, he remembers falling to his knees, he remembers his heart being ripped right out of his chest. He remembers crying and crying and crying. Then it goes dark. And now he's here, thrown into time and space all the way back to the previous Sunday, into a parallel universe where the curtains are yellow and Even is his.

And _okay_ , he's definitely crazy. Fucking insane, really. That must be it, because time travel? Parallel universes? Things like that don't exist, not really. Sure, he likes entertaining the idea of it, enjoys fantasising about it, but it's not real. It can't be. So the only explanation is that he's lost his mind. Or maybe he's hallucinating or dreaming or _something_. Whatever it is, it's not possible that he somehow travelled to another dimension.

But if he did, would it be so bad?

Fuck. _No_. He can't think like that. He needs to get back to the real world, he needs to wake up, but he has no idea how. Maybe if he just shut his eyes-

“You know,” a familiar voice calls out from somewhere to his left. “Closing your eyes and counting to ten to solve all your problems stopped working when we were like... seven.”

“ _Eva?_ ”

Eva snorts, nudging him aside to make room for herself on the bench. “Don't act so surprised to see me.”

But he _is_ surprised. See, he and Eva weren't exactly friends anymore, not since the whole thing with Jonas and Chris last year. Sure, they still hung out with the whole gang and they still said hi when they bumped into each other, but it wasn't the way it used to be. And now that she's here, in this world, he's only reminded how much he misses being her friend.

“What are you doing here?” he asks, uncertainty lacing his tone as that furrowed look finds its way onto his face again.

“Even called me,” she answers matter-of-factly, as if it was the most obvious thing in the world.

“Even?” Isak's voice sounds a little too excited so he clears his throat, toning it down a little as he rolls his lips in, shrugging his shoulders casually. “I don't- I mean, Even who? I don't know Even.”

Eva gives him a pointed look, eyes narrowed and lips pursed. “You're wearing his jacket.”

Isak's face falls, and he has no good response to that so he just drops his gaze, idly tugging at the long sleeve. Eva sighs, ducking her head to meet his eyes and her arm comes to rest around his shoulders.

“Look, he said you were acting weird, then you walked out on breakfast and he just... he wanted me to check on you, okay?”

“Why?”

“He's your boyfriend, Isak,” Eva says with a roll of her eyes, shaking his shoulders a little. “He's supposed to be worried about you.”

“ _Boyfriend_ ,” Isak echoes, the word sounding foreign coming from his mouth. He kinda likes it, though. And well, he supposes if Eva knows, then everyone else knows too. Fucking fantastic. He huffs, “Right.”

Eva must've noticed the odd tone in his voice because she frowns, pulling back a little to look at him properly, her bright eyes assessing his face. “Are you two okay? Is that what this is about?”

Isak shakes his head quickly, saying, “No, no. It's not that. We're fine, it's just... I don't know.” He lets out a loud groan, burying his face into his hands. “If he's so worried, why isn't he here then?”

“Because if you wanted to talk to him now, you wouldn't have left the house in the first place. He knows that,” she says, giving him a small nudge. “And he also knows that if he called Jonas, you two would've just gotten drunk or high or something.”

Isak tries to laugh at that, but his voice comes out a little more choked up than he means it to, and he turns to look up at Eva, his eyes wide. “Jonas isn't mad at me?”

That gets a weird look out of her, and she almost laughs. “Why would he be mad at you?”

Isak shrugs, his lips curling down and his voice is small, quiet, when he mumbles, “I've kinda been a shitty friend to him lately.”

“Wha-”

“To you too, Eva,” he says, sitting up straighter, the frown on his face only deepening with every passing moment. “With that whole thing last year.”

Now Eva looks genuinely confused, her eyebrows pulling together in the middle of her forehead. “What thing last year?”

Isak is about to tell her, about to blurt it all out, everything about her and Jonas and Chris, but he stops himself because what if none of it happened here? What if it's different here? If he and Even are together here, then maybe Eva and Jonas are still together too. He'd like that. They were good together. And if they are, he wouldn't want to ruin things between them again by telling her about the shit that happened in his world. Maybe things are just better in this world, and maybe they should stay that way.

So he just mutters, “Never mind,” and he drops his head onto her shoulder, and she does the same, letting the topic slide.

They're quiet for a while, just sitting there, just being around each other because sometimes that's all anyone really needs. And at some point, Eva whispers, “You're my best friend, you know?”

Isak won't ever admit it to her, but it feels so good when he gets to say, “I know.”

—

By the time Isak makes his way home, it's almost dusk. He and Eva spent the whole day talking, about anything and everything, and he's decided to just accept the fact that this _is_ a parallel universe and he isn't crazy. It's too real, too solid, for it to be just a dream, or a hallucination, but either way, while he's stuck here, he's just going to have to deal with it. For starters, he has to accept the things he found out about this world:

1\. He and Even are a couple. They have been for months now and everyone knows. Everyone knows and everyone still loves him.

2\. Eva and Jonas never broke up. In fact, they're more in love than ever. And apparently, they have Isak to thank for that.

3\. Noora's still in London, and William's taking good care of her. Everyone's planning to visit them soon.

It's obvious that in more ways than one, this world is better than his, that the other versions of them here have it so, so much better than they do back home. It makes him wonder if staying here would be such a bad thing. It makes him wonder if he's here, then is the other Isak living in his world? If he is, surely he must want to find his way back home. After all, his world is nothing compared to this one.

All this wondering is making his head swirl and as soon as he pushes his way into his room, all he wants to do is crash into his bed and go to sleep.

“Hello.”

“Fuck!” Isak jumps back so hard that he slams against the door, banging his head on the hard wood and before he knows it, there are arms pulling him into a hug, hands cradling his head and a soft voice saying, “Hey, hey, _easy_. It's me. It's just me.”

It is him. It's Even. But it's not _his_ Even. Isak needs to remember that. And he shouldn't, he really shouldn't, but Isak lets himself melt into Even's body, breathing in his smoky scent and his own arms slowly find their way around Even's waist, latching tightly onto him like he's afraid to let go. Maybe he is. After all, he doesn't know how long he'll have this, how long he'll have Even.

Even doesn't ask why he was gone so long, doesn't even ask where he was the whole time. And he doesn't ask why Isak's holding onto him like a lifeline, he just pulls him in closer, whispering nice things in his ear. _Not his Even_ , he tells himself when Even starts planting small kisses along his jaw. _Not his Even._ He feels Even leading him towards the bed, his hands pushing the too-big jacket right off his body. _Not his Even._ He feels small as Even hovers over him, his open mouth pressing warm kisses on every inch of Isak's exposed skin. _Not his Even, not his Even, not his-_

“Do you think this is happening with the other Even and Isak too?”

Isak shoots up immediately, accidentally knocking Even in the face and they both groan loudly, rubbing at their foreheads. That's gonna bruise.

“What did you just say?” Isak asks, face scrunched up as he sits up with his legs crossed, as does Even, their knees just barely touching.

Even licks his bottom lip, voice laced with slight uncertainty. “Uh, you know, that thing you were talking about yesterday. About the other versions of us.”

Isak is even more curious now, sitting up even straighter. _The other Isak thought about it too?_ Isak shakes his head lightly, eyebrows arching and lips parting in disbelief. “I talked about that?”

Even laughs, but it comes out a little funny and he gives Isak a ‘duh’ nod. “Yeah, dummy. Like, all that stuff about how you think there's a parallel universe out there where there's another Even and Isak, lying down in the exact same way that we were, except they had-”

“White curtains,” Isak finishes, feeling a little breathless at this point. Even nods in agreement and Isak suddenly grabs both his hands, making him gasp. Isak loosens his grip, but his voice is still desperate when he asks, “Well, do you believe it?”

Even's voice comes with a small huff when he mutters, “I already told you yesterday that I don't really like to think about it.”

Fuck. This Even is skeptical too, but at least he knows a little something about it. It's better than nothing.

Isak takes a deep breath, looking him straight in the eye and he says, “What if I told you that it exists? And that I've seen it?” He pauses, sucking in another heavy breath, eyes going wide. “Because I'm from there.”

Even is quiet for a moment or two, maybe three, and he blinks at Isak. Again, and again. “You're from there,” he says eventually, but he sounds hesitant, voice slow and unsure. “From a parallel universe... And you, what, _travelled_ here?”

“Uh, yeah.”

Even tugs his hands out of Isak's, reaching up to hold Isak's face in his palms, thumbs gently brushing over the curve of his cheekbones and Isak feels naked under his strong gaze, almost literally _feels_ his eyes raking over every inch of his face.

It's all oddly intense, their faces close together, eyes locked on each other's, breathing the same air. In the small space between them, Even whispers, “Issy?” and just the sound of it makes Isak wants to kiss him, his body automatically leaning in and his eyes fluttering shut.

Then he hears, “Are you high again?”

“ _Excuse me?_ ”

Even winces at his tone, but he doesn't move, doesn't even blink. “Did Eva bring Jonas? Is that why you were gone for so long?”

“Oh my god,” Isak mutters, pulling himself away from Even's grip and he scoffs. “I can't believe you right now.”

Even sighs, a little more defeated this time as he reaches out to Isak, who's crawling off the bed, away from him. “I'm not mad, Isak.” He pauses, thoughtful. “I mean, _okay_ , I kinda wished you'd invited me, but- _No_ , no, that's not the point. The point is, it's fine if you wanted to go smoke with your friends-”

“For fuck's sake, I wasn't getting stoned!” Isak cries, exasperation ringing clear in his voice and he gives Even a sharp look. “And I'm not crazy either. There are other worlds out there and this world isn't mine. I'm not from here. I don't know how to prove it to you, but this isn't my life and I need to find a way to get back there. You have to believe me. _Please_.”

Even swallows thickly, his lips pressed together into a thin line and it takes him a little while, but eventually he says, “Okay.”

“Okay?”

“Okay,” he repeats, firmer this time. “I believe you.”

Isak searches his face for any sign of doubt, any hint of uncertainty, but there isn't any. All he sees is curiosity. Like he wants to know more. Like he wants to listen. And that's all Isak needs, someone who's willing to listen.

Isak crawls back onto the bed, leaning onto the pillows this time and Even does the same on his side, the both of them lying on their sides, facing each other.

“Tell me about your world.”

He says it so simply, like he was asking Isak to talk to him about the weather or whatever was on the news today, but it's more than that. So much more and Isak has no idea where to begin.

“The curtains are white,” he finds himself saying, and it seems like the right start, the words sounding familiar on his tongue. “And I don't have you.”

Even gives him a look. _Go on_ , it says, _tell me more._

“When I woke up this morning, in the other world – my world – I woke up alone. You were gone and you left a note with a drawing of me on it, and it said _‘I don't sleep cause sleep is the cousin to death’_ and uh,” Isak blushes, “ _‘you look hot when you're asleep’_.”

Even smiles at that, the corners of his eyes crinkling, his hand coming up to poke at Isak's burning cheeks. “Is that why you asked me that this morning?”

Isak nods, deciding to continue before he turned into a full on tomato. “I, um, I didn't hear from you for a few days after that. You didn't answer my texts, didn't come to school. I thought something happened to you.” He tries to smile, but it doesn't quite reach his eyes. “Then you finally showed up one day, and you kissed me in the boys' locker room-”

“Classy,” Even teases, eyebrows arched, lips quirked up.

Isak laughs in agreement, finally letting a small chuckle escape his throat, but it fades as quickly as it came when Isak remembers the rest of what happened that day. “You told me that you and Sonja were taking a break-”

“Sonja?”

“Your girlfriend,” Isak says, the words tasting bitter in his mouth. Even's mouth forms an ‘O’ but he doesn't say anything else about it, so Isak clears his throat, continuing. “Then you asked me if my parents would be okay with us being together, and I asked you what your parents would think of me. You said that they'd love me.”

Even's face falters for a split second and if Isak had blinked right then, he would've missed it, but his smile is back into place before Isak can comment on it.

“After that, you texted me saying things were going too fast, and you needed time.” Isak's voice grows quieter with every word, like if he says it soft enough, it'll just disappear. Even is looking at him more intently now, his hand coming to rest on Isak's neck, feeling his pulse under his skin. Isak, on the other hand, can't seem to meet his eyes when he tells him the rest, his voice growing cold. “I saw you at a party later that week. I thought you were alone at first, but then Sonja was there, and she kissed you. Then you kissed her back.” Isak laughs, but it's empty, hollow. “The worst part is that you actually seemed happy.”

“Isak...”

“I ran out, obviously,” Isak says before Even can continue. “I kinda freaked out. I mean, I was drunk and- and upset. I think I broke down in the middle of nowhere, and that's the last thing I remember before I woke up here.”

It's quiet right then, the kind of quiet that presses in on your ears, makes you feel like you're suffocating and Isak hates it. He wants to say something, just to break the silence, but Even beats him to it.

“I'm sorry,” is what he says, and Isak's confused.

“Why are you sorry?” Isak snorts, eyebrows furrowed. “You didn't do anything, the other Even did all that.”

“ _Right_.” Even clicks his tongue, his thumb rubbing circles into his skin, soft, barely there. “But still, I-”

“No, don't- don't pity me just yet,” Isak interrupts, sounding a little self-deprecating, to be honest. “It gets worse.”

“Worse?”

Isak nods, feeling his stomach churn with dread as he begins to tell Even about the rest. “Eva and Jonas broke up last year and I'm kinda the reason why. And because of that, Eva and I aren't really friends anymore.” He hears Even suck in a sharp breath at that, as if it's hard for him to believe that he and Eva weren't as close as they are here. “All my friends pretty much hate me, and I don't blame them. I mean, I've been distant, because they don't know. About me, I mean.”

“You're not out yet?” Even asks quietly.

“No,” Isak answers, looking down, voice small. “I don't know how to tell them. I.. I don't know what they'll think of me. What Jonas will think of me."

“Jonas? Why Jonas?”

Isak hesitates, the words caught in his throat and he feels shame written all over his face when he meets Even's eyes. “The reason I wanted to break Eva and Jonas up was because I wanted him. I wanted my best friend and I ruined the only good relationship he ever had, because I had some stupid crush. It was selfish and stupid and I wish I'd never done it, but it happened and I don't know how I'll ever explain myself to him.”

Even hums softly, and Isak wonders if this is uncomfortable for him to hear, but when he searches his eyes, there's no hint of that. There's only understanding, concern. “He'll understand,” he tells Isak, sounding awfully certain of it. “He always does.”

And he's right. Isak can't remember a time when Jonas has ever judged him for something he'd done, or who he is. Sure, they might've argued and disagreed with each other from time to time, but at the end of it, Jonas always had his back. And Isak had his. No matter what. He keeps that in mind.

Isak blinks back tears that he didn't even realise were there, sniffling a little and he coughs to mask it. He goes back to his list of fucked up things in his world, rattling off little things that were off until he ends with, “Oh, and Noora's back from London because she and William broke up.” He scoffs, sounding bitter when he adds, “Love is dead in my world.”

When he looks up at Even, the pity written all over his face is far too obvious and if there's one thing Isak hates, it's feeling like some kind of charity case so he clears his throat, muttering, “But, it can't be all that great here either. I mean, obviously my parents are still divorced since I'm living here, right?”

Even's face falls almost immediately, just like it had when Isak mentioned his parents earlier and his voice shakes a little when he repeats, “ _Right_ , Even?”

Even gulps, his voice the opposite of Isak's, firm and stony when he says, “Isak, your parents aren't divorced. They're dead.”

Isak feels his stomach churn and disbelief kicks in almost immediately because _no_. Just no. “My parents aren't dead,” he says, shaking his head. “They're not.”

“They were in an accident last year-”

“ _No_ , they weren't. They couldn't be. I- I talk to my dad all the time and my mom- she sends me Bible quotes, like, everyday. See-” He fumbles around, reaching for his phone and when he opens up his messages, he's almost certain that he'll see another verse at the top of the screen but there's only Even's name there. He scrolls through the page, eyes scanning every single name until it lands on ‘Mamma’, and if his heart hadn't dropped before, it definitely has now. The last message was from a year ago, reading:

_Don't stay up too late, we'll be back by midnight! Love you x_

“No, no, _no!_ ” Isak throws his phone at the wall, refusing to believe it. They can't be dead. It's not possible. But then again, nothing about today seems possible. He's so shaken that he doesn't even realise that Even's pulled him into his arms until he feels Even's heart beating against his cheek, the soft thumping slowly but surely calming him down.

“It's okay,” Even tells him, voice slow and soothing, fingertips tracing circles onto his back. “You're okay. You're safe here, with Eskild and Linn. They've been taking care of you. Your friends too, Eva, Jonas. They're your family. You know that, don't you?”

It takes a while, but eventually Isak nods, his cheek rubbing against Even's chest. They _are_ his family. They were there for him when his parents weren't. And he's gone and ruined things with everyone back home.  
  
They're both quiet for a long time, probably trying to process everything that they've told each other and for a brief moment, Isak feels that suffocating silence again. It doesn't last long though, because Even's voice cuts clear through it, firm and sure of himself when he asks, “Why don't you just stay here? I know you don't have your parents anymore, but you have your roommates and your friends. And if it counts for anything, you have me. So why don't you just stay?”

Isak thought the answer to that was obvious enough, but from the looks of it, Even hadn't considered it so he sighs, shaking his head. “Because it's not my world. I don't belong here.”

To that, Even says, “But you belong with me.”

Isak falters, just for a second, and when he smiles again, it's sad. “If I stay, you won't get your Isak back. You'll be stuck with _me_. Don't you get that?”

“And _you_ are still Isak.” It's only then that Isak sees it, clear in his bright blue eyes; Even doesn't believe him. He still believes that there's only one Isak and only one Even. He'd been entertaining Isak's stories as though they were just that, stories that Isak was making up and he almost pulls himself away, until he hears, “And you're still the one that I love.”

Isak freezes, his body going rigid and when his gaze meets Even's again, this time it's love that's pooling in his eyes. He'd seen it before, in Eva's eyes, and in Jonas', and in Noora's too. Undoubtedly, pure fucking love and he's not sure what he's supposed to do about it.

“In every universe, every point of time, every single version of you and me,” Even says, both his hands cradling Isak's face now, pulling him in so that their foreheads are pressed against one another's, eyes locked. His lips find Isak's, slotting against them in a perfect fit, soft and hard and sweet all at once. He pulls away, but just barely, their lips still brushing and Isak feels his warm breath tingling on his skin when he whispers, “I love _you_. Don't you get that?”

Isak shuts his eyes, stills his body, catches his breath, thinking that if he stopped moving, time might stop with him and maybe he could live in this moment forever. This moment, where Even loves him and everything is good in this world, he wants to stay here forever. But he's not sure if he can, if he's allowed to, so he asks, “Can't I just stay here with you forever? Can I?”

The last thing he hears is Even saying, “You can.”

—

When Isak wakes next, sitting up in his bed, blinking sleep from his eyes, the curtains are white and he's alone again.

He curses silently and he wonders if it was real, if any of it was real, if _he_ was even real. He looks down to see himself dressed in the clothes from the party, his cap laying upside down at the edge of his bed as if it'd been thrown aside in a haste. For a moment, he wonders if the entire thing was just an elaborate dream sequence, triggered by an overwhelming flow of emotions and alcohol, but when he moves, he feels something in his hand, a familiar rustling of paper against his skin. He opens his hand and there's a folded piece of paper in his palm and his breath catches.

His fingers tremble slightly as he slowly unfolds it, shaking from anxiety or excitement, he isn't exactly sure. And _oh_. He feels a rush of relief flood his body. There's a drawing of him and Even lying together, his head on Even's chest and Even's arms around him. And the curtains, oh the curtains. They're messily smudged in every colour possible, a bit of each colour here and there and in equally messy handwriting that's unmistakably Even's, on the bottom, it says:

 _YOU AND ME_  
_IN EVERY UNIVERSE_  
_FOREVER_

It was real. It was real and everything comes rushing into him all at once, flashes of everything that happened, everything he saw, everything he felt. That, combined with the fact that he's only just starting to actually feel the effects of being hungover, is the reason he finds himself running for the bathroom, emptying his insides into the toilet as soon as he gets there. He groans and everything hurts, aching all over. Luckily for him, their bathroom is equipped with a shit ton of aspirin due to the fact that they all get wasted – _a lot_. He throws a couple back, right after he washes out his mouth and brushes his teeth three times. Then he brushes them again for good measure. He manages to pull himself through a quick shower, shivering in his skin and he wraps himself in a warm towel as soon as he steps out. He barely makes it two steps out of the bathroom before he's being blocked by Eskild and Noora, their eyes wide with surprise.

“Isak! You're awake!” Eskild almost shouts, his voice making Isak's ears hurt a little. “We thought you'd still be, you know...” He trails off, making odd gestures and sounds that Isak could only describe as a bad hangover.

Noora smacks his arm and really, Isak should do the same because he looks ridiculous, but instead he surges forward, throwing his arms around Eskild in a strong hug.

“Oh,” he hears from Eskild, sounding pleasantly surprised as his arms slowly come around Isak as well.

“I'm sorry,” Isak mumbles into his shirt, squeezing him tighter. “I'm so sorry. For everything. For all the shit that I said the other day, and for not paying rent, and for making your life harder. All you've ever done is look out for me and I just- _Thank you._ ”

Eskild smiles warmly, holding Isak closer and he doesn't know what to say, because he'd forgiven Isak a long time ago so he just says, “You're welcome, Isak.”

They pull away with a small chuckle, smiling stupidly at each other and Isak feels a weight lifted from his shoulders. It feels good, so he turns to Noora next, who's watching him with an arched eyebrow. “You should go work things out with William,” he tells her and she almost scoffs but he cuts her off. “If anyone's meant to be, it's you two and if he can't see that then he's an idiot.”

Noora's lips part, like she wants to say something, but she decides against it, instead opting for a smile and a small nod. Isak's not sure what it means, but it was worth a try.

Isak gives them both another smile and he heads back to his room, getting dressed and every time he catches a glimpse of the drawing, his heart flutters at the thought that the entire thing was actually real. He has no idea how that's even possible, but if he's being honest, he doesn't really want to know and he's not going to try and find out. Some things are meant to be left alone.

He's about to head out, but when he grabs his phone, he pauses, eyes landing on another Bible text from his mother. He considers calling her, but he doesn't know if he's ready for that, so instead he types out:

_I'm sorry we haven't talked lately. I miss you._

He erases the ‘I miss you’, then he sees the drawing, reminded of how he doesn't even have a mother to say that to in another world and he types the words out again, hitting send before he can change his mind.

He shoves his phone into his pocket, and he makes his way out, his feet leading him on an all too familiar route until he finds himself standing outside Eva's house, knocking on her window like he used to so many times before.

It takes a while for her to open it, and when she does, she looks confused and she sounds it too. “Isak?” She lets him climb inside. “What are you doing here?”

He stands there awkwardly, hands buried in his pockets and he rocks back and forth on his heels, unsure how to put it into words. It's not like he could say _‘Oh, I travelled to a parallel universe where you and I are still best friends and it made me realise how much I miss that so will you please be my friend again?’_ , right? So he settles for, “I miss you.”

Her eyebrows shoot up, a funny smile on her face. “You miss me? That's sweet, Isak, but we just saw each other, like, yesterday.”

“No,” he sighs, running a hand down the side of his face. “That's not what I mean. I miss _you_. I miss talking to you, and doing homework with you over Skype, and making fun of people together. I miss being your friend, Eva.” His voice cracks a little at this point, but he keeps going. “And I know it's my fault that we got this way. I know that you forgave me, and that you said we're okay, but we both know it's not the same as it used to be and I just- Tell me what I have to do make it right again.”

Eva sucks in a breath, her eyes going wide and Isak waits for her to tell him that he's being ridiculous, that she doesn't want to be friends again, but it doesn't come. Instead, he hears, “I missed you too, idiot.”

Then she's hugging him, arms curling around him and head falling to his chest, and he lets out a breath he didn't know he was holding, hugging her back tightly, his cheek resting on her head and man, he really has missed this. So, so much. For a second there, standing in Eva's arms, he felt like the Isak he was a year ago, the Isak that had no worries in the world, the Isak that had friends who loved him and he wishes he could be that Isak again. And now that he and Eva are okay, _really_ okay, he's almost there.

He spends the day with her, just like he had in the other world, and they watch bad movies and eat junk food and talk and talk and talk. And right then and there, in the comfort of her bed, he feels _happy_ and it's more than he could ever ask for.

One best friend down, another to go.

—

He goes to see Jonas the day after, a little later into the day because he's worried Jonas might not be awake so early in the morning. Knowing him, he was probably still recovering from Friday's party. And Isak is right, because he looks half dead when he answers the door, stumbling on his feet a little and Isak has to grab his arm to keep him steady until he manages to get him to the couch.

Isak makes him a coffee, even though he doesn't actually know how to make coffee and it's already past noon, but Jonas takes it anyway, giving Isak a lopsided grin. Isak crashes onto the sofa next to him, waiting quietly as he sobers up a little.

“So,” Jonas says when he can put together a whole sentence without slurring, setting the empty mug on the table. “What's up?”

Isak's mouth gapes, the words stuck in his throat, which is stupid because he'd already gone over exactly what he wanted to say earlier, memorising it like a speech, but he figures that's not the way these things work, so he lets out a small sigh and he blurts out, “I like someone.”

“Okay?” Jonas laughs a little, wondering what that had to with anything. “Good for you, man, but what-”

“That's why I've been so weird lately,” Isak adds, as if that made things any clearer.

Obviously it doesn't because Jonas just arches an eyebrow, saying slowly, “You've been acting weird... because you like someone?”

Isak sighs again – he seems to be doing that a lot lately – and he says, “It's not just someone. It's some _guy_.”

“Okay,” Jonas says again, like it's his answer to everything and he turns to Isak, both eyebrows raised this time. “And what'd this guy do to you?” When Isak gives him an empty stare in return, he rolls his eyes. “Look, I know for a fact that you only ever get this way when someone or something upsets you, so just tell me what he did and we'll fix it.”

Isak is still a little dazed, blinking at him a couple of times. “You don't wanna know who he is?” he asks quietly.

Jonas gives him a small sigh, his arm coming to stretch over Isak's shoulders and he shakes him a little. “Isak, it doesn't matter who he is, what matters is he obviously hurt you and-” He stops abruptly, pulling his head back a little and his eyes narrow. “Wait a minute, it's not me, is it? Because if I did something-”

That gets a laugh out of Isak, full and loud, and he's quick to deny it, shaking his head firmly. “No, no, no. It's not you. Definitely not.”

“ _‘Definitely not’_ ,” Jonas mimics in a dumb voice, scoffing dramatically. “Well, thanks a lot, asshole. You just broke my heart.”

Isak rolls his eyes, shoving his head away as they both burst into laughter, Isak muttering, “Dumbass,” back to him. And it's nice like this, the banter, he hasn't felt it in a while and it feels good. After they manage to catch their breaths, Jonas looks him in the eye, seriously this time, and he says, “It's him, isn't it? The guy from Vilde's theatre group?”

Isak nods, a small smile playing on his lips. “Yeah, it's him. _Even_.” He feels a rush of relief when he says it, like everything that he'd been hiding from Jonas just flowed right out of him, and he can finally breathe again.

“He seems cool,” is what Jonas says then, lips pursed in thought. “What's the problem?”

“He has a girlfriend, for starters,” Isak mutters, unable to help the bitterness in his tone when he says it. “And he keeps going back and forth, I just- I don't know what he wants from me.”

Jonas asks, “Well, what do you want?”

And Isak doesn't really know the answer to that because no one's ever asked him, and he definitely has never asked himself, but all he can think of is, “I want him.”

Jonas grins, clapping him on the shoulder and as if it was the simplest thing in the world, he says, “So, go get him!”

“I don't think it's that easy-”

“Oh, I think it is,” Jonas shoots back, nodding at him. “You're the best guy I've ever known, okay? And he'd be insane not to want you. So you tell him that and if he still wants to fuck around, I could definitely take him in a fight.”

Isak snorts, trying to picture Jonas tackling Even down and it just looks ridiculous, so he laughs and Jonas laughs with him, shoving his shoulder playfully.

“You mean it?” Isak asks when he calms down a little, looking Jonas right in the eye.

“Yeah, I mean it,” Jonas tells him, not an ounce of doubt in his voice. Then he smirks, cocking his head to the side and eyes narrowing. “There's one thing I hate about you though...”

“What's that?”

“You make the shittiest coffee in the world.”

And just like that, exploding into another fit of bubbly laughter, they were back again; Isak and Jonas, Jonas and Isak. Best friends. Inseparable. In this universe and the next.

—

Isak waits until Monday to confront Even. He decides to send him a text in the morning, but he's nervous, pacing around the hallway and typing and erasing and retyping the message so many times that eventually Jonas groans, snatching the phone away from him and threatening, “Press send or I will.”

Isak huffs, trying to grab the phone from his hand but Jonas raises his eyebrows, those damn eyebrows, clicking his tongue and holding the phone over his head. “Promise you'll send it?”

Eyes narrowed and lips pursed, Isak reluctantly nods, grumbling a weak, “Promise.” So Jonas hands him the phone, and he reads over the message one last time:

_Meet me in the locker room. After school. Please._

He erases the ‘please’, hearing a small scoff from Jonas but he quickly hits send before giving his friend a small shrug of his shoulders, muttering, “Please sounds too desperate.”

“You are desperate though.”

“Shut up.”

So Jonas does, and he doesn't wait for a reply, he just pockets his phone, the drawing folded up in there too, and they head straight to class, Isak putting aside any thoughts of Even for the day. He barely makes it through, but Jonas keeps him going, giving him encouraging words – some of which went along the lines of _‘Think about how much you'll fuck if you work things out with him’_ – and pats on the back when he needs it. He'd almost forgotten how much of an idiot Jonas could be. He'd almost forgotten how much he loved that about him.

“Remember,” Jonas says before Isak goes to see Even, pulling him into a hug. “Tell him what you want.”

Isak nods into his shoulder, giving him a firm squeeze before he pulls away, telling him, “Thanks, man.”

Jonas gives him a small salute before he leaves and Isak suddenly feels his stomach drop, because he doesn't know if he can do this. He doesn't know if he can even look at Even, let alone talk to him, confront him. He shakes his head to clear his thoughts, taking a few deep breaths before he steps into the locker room and _oh_. Even's already there.

“Hi.” The way Even says it makes him sounds a little breathless, like he's surprised that Isak actually showed. On the contrary, Isak is the surprised one. He was worried Even might not turn up, considering the circumstances. He's not sure if Even's aware that Isak saw him with Sonja the other night, but either way, there was still the fact that he told Isak he needed time. Isak takes him being here as a good sign.

“Hi,” he says back, and he notices that he sounds just as breathless as Even did. Maybe even more if it was possible.

“How are you?” Even asks, even though they both know the answer to that. It's obvious in the dark circles around Isak's eyes, the nervous jitter in his legs, the quietness of his voice.

But just to entertain them both, Isak answers, “I'm fine. You?”

“Been better,” is what he replies, and they both hear the small crack in his voice, and Isak tells himself that maybe it's because of him. Maybe it's because Even misses him.

Isak gives him a sad smile, and it's quiet for a while, neither of them knowing what to say. But he figures since he's the one who called Even here, he should be the one to speak first and Jonas' words ring in the back of his mind. _Tell him what you want._ Isak steadies himself, inhaling deeply and he says, “I like you. Okay? I like you a lot and I want you. I want to be with you. And I don't know what exactly it is you want, but I know that somewhere, deep down, you want me too.”

“Isak...”

His voice sounds dangerous like that, heavy and dragged out, and Isak is afraid of the words that threaten to come with that voice, but he needs to know the truth. He needs Even to make up his mind. So he fixes a sharp gaze on Even's blue eyes, saying, “Look me in the eye and tell me that you don't and I'll leave you alone. I swear I will.”

“I don't...” Even mutters, sucking in a sharp breath, just as Isak's heart begins to jump up his throat, his eyes starting to feel wet. Then Even cracks a broken smile. “I don't want you to leave me alone.”

Isak's about to let out a breath of relief, but he doesn't get a chance to because he hears a, “But...”

“But what?”

“I was serious when I said things were going too fast,” Even tells him, worrying his bottom lip between his teeth. “If we're gonna do this, we have to go slow.”

Isak lets out a choked up noise, an odd mix between a laugh and a sob, and he nods, a smile tugging at the corners of his lips. “I'm okay with slow. We can go as slow as you want, as long as we actually _go_ somewhere.”

Even looks like he wants to smile, but it isn't reaching his eyes, like there's something else he wants to say. “I need to tell you something first though.”

Isak braces himself, tells himself it can't hurt him because he knows exactly what it is, but it still stings when he hears, “I kissed Sonja. Or she kissed me. I don't know. It just.. It was at a party, on Friday night, and I just-”

“I know,” Isak mumbles quietly, feeling small all of a sudden, eyes cast downward. “I saw.”

Even visibly stiffens, lips parted in a small gasp. “You were there?”

“Yeah. My, um, my friends wanted to go so...” He trails off, not really wanting to recall the events of that night again.

“I'm sorry,” Even says, and for a second there, Isak is reminded of the other Even, face laced with pity and kindness curved into a warm smile. He shakes his head and he sees the real Even, his Even, and it's shame on his face, guilt almost. “I'm so sorry, but you have to understand. All of this, you and me, it's all new to me and I guess I panicked, and Sonja- she- she's _safe_ , you know?”

“And I'm not?” Isak asks, unable to help the tinge of hurt in his tone, tears threatening to form in the corners of his eyes.

Even laughs, once, just a small _ha!_ and he shakes his head. “You're definitely not. You're dangerous, Isak, but I'm not- I'm not saying that's a bad thing.” Isak scoffs, about to turn away but Even catches his face in hands, keeping their eyes locked. “Look, everything about you makes me afraid because being with you means that I could lose you and I don't think I could ever go through that.”

And oh man, Isak's a goner. If he's being honest, he's lucky that Even's holding him because if he wasn't, his knees might just give way and he'd melt straight to the ground. He lets himself smile, slow and sweet, and he tells Even, “You won't have to. I promise. Because we're meant to be together, I know it, I saw it, I _felt_ it. In the other universe.”

“The other universe...?”

“You know, the one with the yellow curtains! Look-” Isak digs into his pocket, pulling out the drawing and he unfolds it, excitement bubbling up inside him. But-

“Isak, there's nothing there.”

Isak shakes his head, flipping the paper over, reaching into his pocket to make sure there isn't another paper in there but there's only his phone and he swears he had the right one because he'd stared at the drawing all through break time earlier. He sighs, shoving the paper back into his jacket and he says, “Never mind that. The point is, we were _happy_. You loved me, and I think I loved you too. And maybe we're not there yet, but we could be. We just have to give it a chance. You have to give _me_ a chance. Can you do that for me?”

“I can,” Even answers, a smile of his own curving onto his lips, making his eyes crinkle around the corners and he leans forward, pressing his lips onto Isak's and he kisses him like he's suffocating and Isak is the only bit of oxygen left in the world. He kisses him like he's never kissed anyone before, hungry and needy. And there's too much tongue, too much teeth, but Isak doesn't care because he kisses him like he _wants_ him, like he's never wanted anything more than this. And that's all Isak needs; someone who wants him as much he wants them and he's got it now. He's got Even now.

When Even finally pulls away, he's still smiling and his eyes are still shut, eyelashes spread onto his cheekbones and Isak's never seen anything more beautiful.

“Did you really see into a parallel universe?”

“I did.” And when Isak's eyes flicker downwards for a second, he catches a glimpse of colours on the paper sticking out of his pocket. The drawing, for his eyes only. His little secret.

He kisses Even again, gentle this time, and he whispers against his lips, “You and me. In every universe. Forever.”

“Forever,” Even echoes and just like that, everything is the right in the world.

The curtains are still white, but Isak's not alone anymore.

**Author's Note:**

> Leave me a comment and let me know what you think! I'm on [twitter](https://twitter.com/valtershea) if you ever wanna say hi or leave prompts/requests! Kudos is always appreciated and if you enjoyed this, please share it around for me! ♡


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